S3E6 - Dodging Bullets

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What's up, guys, it's your
girl lady's thinger And we are back with

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another episode of gems antone. Somebody's
sleeping, they're not on their game.

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Somebody all the time do I.
I'm trying to give you a little shine,

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you know, trying to switch it
up this season all inclusive, Right,

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I'm a shine bright? Okay.
So tonight's episode ripped straight from Socials

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once again. It centers around a
young lady who has been dating a guy

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for three years. They're in a
committed relationship dating. This young man lost

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his job and went to his girlfriend
of three years and asked her to pay

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his mortgage. She said no.
The reason why I believe she said no

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is because she's just a girlfriend,
not a wife. When she said no,

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he then came back at her with
a spreadsheet of things he has done

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or paid for her over the last
three years that have total to twenty thousand

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dollars. After doing so, he
then broke up with her. Who is

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right? Who is wrong? I
think the belief was on her behalf that

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she's not a wife. She's not
paying for the mortgage. I believe she

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had mentioned moving in with him to
this house before and was shut down,

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and so therefore why would she pay
his mortgage? So I think that's the

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backstory. What you think about that? Are you one certain about the She

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wanted to move in and he said
no, Yes, I think he said

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he was not ready for that the
time that she mentioned it. They are

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only been together for three years,
so I don't know when she might have

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mentioned moving in. But the the
simple fact is you didn't want to move

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in with me. Here we are. I'm a girlfriend, that's that's the

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status. I'm not paying your mortgage, That's what she said. He didn't

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agree with that cause he's done so
many things for her over the last three

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years, totally X, Y and
Z. So he broke up with her.

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Guys of course were like, oh, you dodged a bullet, and

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the women of course were like,
uh, yes, this we agree.

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You shouldn't be doing white things if
you're not a wife. Where you at

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with it? Well, normally I'd
be like, if you're in a relationship,

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you don't put no dollar amount on
it. But I can see that

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if she tried to further the relationship
and was like, hey, I wanna

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move in and he was like nah, now may now holding off maybe later

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and then turns around and this situation
comes up, and then it's like now

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it's like, hey, listen,
so you think you can let me hold

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something my mortgage because you know I'm
out of that job. I think he

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has to eat that on his own. Mm. Interesting. But if if

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that, if that wasn't a part
of the scenario, it wasn't part of

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the scenario, then if you're in
a relationship, then I think she's wrong

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for if she had the means not
helping him out. Hmm. But that

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one little conversation makes all the difference. It makes a difference in my mind

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because it showed that he didn't want
now he may not have wanted to pursue

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anything further than just this girlfriend boyfriend
thing, and it wasn't in furtherance of

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a relationship between the two of them. So it's like it makes it a

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little questionable about his motives to me. So I wouldn't I wouldn't one hundred

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percent say like I said, because
I'm totally against putting numbers on relationships.

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So if your mortgage was twenty five
hundred and I had the means, then

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I can give it you. But
if like I said, if it was

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a situation where he kind of put
her off, I wouldn't feel obligated to

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help him out. Well, what
if she asked about this move and anything

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within the first six months of their
relationship. Here we are three years later.

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Things have now progressed and he has
obviously spent twenty thousand dollars, as

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proven by his spreadsheet that he's keeping
track on. Why can't I pay this

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mortgage one until he gets on his
feet or one time? I think it

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was a one time, a one
shot deal that he was looking for.

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I mean, first of all,
I think it's a real petty that you

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calculated all these things you did,
Like who keeps track of anything like that

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for three years? No, less
like I could. I couldn't even tell

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you when the last time I paid
for anything within the last couple of days

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and how much it was. You
went back three years and was like,

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all right, So so you pretty
much hid it in your mind that you

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were going to use this information at
some point. She sounds like doged a

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bullet on this because this man was
holding this like this is what I did

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for you, and again in the
relationship, it shouldn't be what I'm doing

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for you. You should just do
for each other and then keep pushing.

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So if he was petty enough to
come up with twenty thousand dollars worth stuff,

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and then who to say if it
wasn't actually even twenty thousand dollars worth

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of stuff? Like who says charge
was right? He could have been off?

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Like who keeps track of how much
they spent on meals or what kind

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of gifts they bought? You know, who's not gonna keep track and not

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gonna be off me? Her because
she ain't paying this mortgage. Well I

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don't know that that she wasn't keeping
track. But was she given the same

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as he was in the relationship?
Who knows? We don't know. We

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didn't get that aspect that or was
that possibly him trying to well, I

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mean he didn't. She did say
he lose he lost his job, So

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I don't get I don't think it
was a test to see if she would

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say it. It could have been
a test. He could have still had

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it. He could he could have
been trying to dodge a bullet. But

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I don't like I said to me, it's petty that he's keeping track of

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that type of money. I mean, not that that type of money,

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just those things because in a relationship, you're giving because you want to give,

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not because you want something in return. And if she in turn,

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like even if it was six months
and she's like, I want to move

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in, she could have easily brought
it back up at this time like,

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well, I'm cool with that,
but you know, how about in order

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for me to pay that, not
in order for me to pay that stip.

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You must do this, in order
to do this right, But more

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of a well you know what,
now it's a good time to revisit,

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like we can move in and in
that way, I don't have to pay

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mine and yours and you know we
can go from here. That's a don't

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thinking right there, look at that. I'm a full adult. But you

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know, if she wanted to,
she could have brought it up like that,

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had a conversation and then if he
said, now I'm not ready to

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do that, then you're on your
own with this mortgage. That's messed up.

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Still no, but but it shows
where he's at, like his mindset

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when he's like, nah, I
don't want you moving in, but you

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will take my money so you can
stay here. But it's supposed to be

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like, all right, yeah,
come on out of desperation. Suppose he

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said, yeah, come on moving
just because he's desperate, and then lets

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him move in. Yeah, we'll
shoot and he's stuck, Like, if

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you're gonna go that far, he's
he's one of a job. He got

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this big mortgage he gotta pay,
and that's the mail ticket right there,

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and yeah, I'm desperate. I
mean, guys, guys do a lot

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of things out of desperation. I'm
not saying he but and I'm pretty sure

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that he can do it and then
turn around and be like, yeah,

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this is not working out. Like
he could piss her off and make her

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upset, and she'd be like,
you know, I don't want to be

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here. No, it could be
a lot of things in that scenario.

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Nobody wants to be here. But
yeah, I'm gonna go with If it

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went down exactly like that and nobody's
embellishing, then she was right for not

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doing it for him. Wow.
But if she embellished and added some extras

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in there, then how could she
embellish what's stand embellished the fact that she

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ain't paying this mortgage because she is
a girlfriend and he didn't want to move

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in with her, but again and
make her wife. It's not it's not

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a matter of if, because you
know, he's not on her timeline as

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far as that relationship is, because
he like she may want to be married

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now, he maybe want he may
want to be married later or not at

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all or not at all, and
she he can't. Now, if she's

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willing to, you know, to
be in a relationship like that, then

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fine, but she's not that She
made that very clear. I'm not paying

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clear that. No, she just
said, I don't live with you.

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I'm not paying your mortgage. Yeah, but I'm a girlfriend and girlfriends don't

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pay mortgages. And now if that's
the attitude, then I would say,

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now you want he dodged the bullet, Yeah, he dodged the bullets.

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Make up your mind. You can't
have it all that depends on like the

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actual scenario. Like you you can't
be in a relationship and not be willing

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to give because you don't know if
it's going to lead to marriage. You

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don't know if it's going to end
in marriage. You don't know where it's

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going to go, So you you're
gonna hold off until that point, Like,

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how do you get to grow together
if you can't be willing to sacrifice

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on the way. But well,
that's what it is. She's a girlfriend

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and not willing to pay a mortgage, but why are you put She's pretty

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much put in the stipulation, if
you want me to pay this mortgage,

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I have to be more than a
girlfriend. She at least wanted to be

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a living girlfriend, which again could
have been a conversation. But it was

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a conversation because it wasn't a conversation
when at that moment it was before and

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he wasn't. He was like,
nah, I'm good on that. Now

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later on, when he's in this
position, he may feel a little bit

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different. But that's the worst time
because now now I know you only want

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me to move in here because you're
desperate, not because you want to be

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with me, but because you need
my money and the possible So that's the

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worst time. But it could also
be him realizing that, you know what,

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I do need a partner to do
this with, because he can easily

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say, yeah, I'm still not
trying to you know, have you move

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in here? And then if she
don't do it, then all right,

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I'm out, or well he chose
out. He chose yeah, and he's

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probably out now. No, not
probably out. He chose out. He

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broke up with her. He broke
up with her. He broke up with

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her after right after he gave her
the spreads to showed her that he spent

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twenty thousand. It's like, all
right, I'm out. I don't know.

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I think he might have been just
looking for an out and lying and

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lying about losing his job. No, no, not lying about losing his

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job, like he just like,
you know what, I'm gonna get ahead

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and use this because if you're not
willing to do that, and being like,

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if he spent all of his money, then he must have felt like

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she wasn't spending any kind of money. So this could have been him shying

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to see where she was at with
it maybe, or he could just be

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petty betty, because twenty thousand dollars
over three years ain't that much money for

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adults. I mean, it depends
on what these adults are doing. Yeah,

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well they like to eat good to
know. Twenty thousand dollars is not

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a lot. No, so not
over three years and one year? Sure?

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Now, yo, I spent twenty
thousand dollars on you last year what

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are you talking about? You can't
pay my mortgage for one month? Yeah

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I could see that. Yeah,
I mean yeah, because that's that's not

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a lot to spend in three years. I think that could have been one

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trip per year. Yeah, the
way you like to travel, not the

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way I like to travel. All
right, So hmm, we're not sure

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who dodged the bullet air, but
I'm gonna go away. She dodged the

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bullet because of that spreadsheet. They
both dodged bullets. They just weren't meant

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for each other exactly. That's it. That's what they found out. Look

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at you. We're not supposed to
be here again with nobody's supposed to no,

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okay, all right, Well on
that note, he can't even get

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through it. He cracked himself out. Hi, y'all will catch y'all on

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the next one. Little